Shadows from the past
by Bellysa
Summary: (Complete). Kaoru always says that she doesn't care about Kenshin's past. But... will she always think the same? What if she finds something out...? (It's my first fic, so please read it and tell me what you think.)
1. The smile of the wolf

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin belongs to Nobuhiro Watsuki, Shueisha, Sony… I'm not trying to make money with this (as if anyone would pay me for this thing…)  
  
Hello minna! It's my first fic ^__^… so I would like you to read it and tell me what you think. English is not my first language soooooo… well, I hope you understand everything. If you don't understand something (or anything) please tell me and I would try to correct it.  
  
After reading the first reviews and mails (THANKS ^__^) I´ve discovered that you don't like one sentence Kaoru says…I've changed it. I've also erased all of the 'de gozaru yo' (I also think they don't go with the story). You've also told me that you think that there is a little too much OOC…Well, I think that there is no fanfic without OOC, but since you want to be warned… well… WARNING! OOC!  
  
Well, here it goes…  
  
Shadows from the past.  
  
Chapter one.  
  
The smile of a wolf.  
  
  
  
Her face went suddenly pale. She coudn't believe what she had just heard…she couldn't…  
  
A single tear went down her cheek and fell to her hand. He had… he had killed…  
  
Another tear fell from her eyes, her deep blue eyes. Then she fainted.  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
"Tadaima!"  
  
The voice of Kenshin sounded form the gates of the dojo. 'Tadaima'. He had never thought that he could say that word again. 'I'm home'. Home. That was his home. And his family. Yahiko, Sanosuke, Megumi…and Kaoru. Kaoru.  
  
An image of the girl appeared in his mind. Kaou. She was the reason. He smiled and went into the house.  
  
Kaoru. He had never thought that he could have a home. But especially he had never thought of loving again. Not after Tomoe. Hoewever, she appeared in his life, a ray of light in the darkness. It was so wonderful just being with her, looking at her smile… Getting lost in her eyes…  
  
"Kaoru-dono? Yahiko?"  
  
He looked for them in the house, but it was empty. They were supposed to be at home… He heard laughs coming from the street.  
  
"Well, I don't think so Yahiko-CHAN!"  
  
"WHO ARE YOU CALLING CHAN?!?!?!? ROOSTER HEAD!!!!!"  
  
Kenshin smiled as he saw his friends going into the house.  
  
"Oi, Kenshin! Is dinner ready? I'm hungry!" Sano grinned, waiting for an affirmative answer.  
  
"I was about to prepare it. I've just arrived."  
  
"So where's busu? She didn't cook anything? Well, I don't feel like dying today!" Yahiko waited for his master to suddenly appear and knock him with her bokken, but nothing happened. "She isn't at home?"  
  
"I thought she was here, but I haven't found her."  
  
"She may be at the Akabeko with Tae. C'mon Kenshin don't worry AGAIN! Jo- chan is old enough. She knows how to defend herself" Sano didn't like the look of Kenshin. Man, the only thing that guy could do was worrying for the girl!  
  
Kenshin sighed. "I'll go to the kitchen."  
  
"Great!" Sano sat and waited for his dinner. He and Yahiko started fighting again.  
  
'They are very noisy' Kenshin thought. But he liked that noise. He liked the sounds of that house, of that people. He only missed the laughs that always followed Kaoru.  
  
'Mou' he said to himself 'I'd better prepare dinner before Kaoru's back'.  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
'It's late. It's too late.' Kenshin was worrying more than usual. 'Why hasn't she arrived yet? Where is she?'  
  
Sano had alredy gone home. Yahiko was in his room. But there was no trace of Kaoru. Kenshin caught his sakabatou and went out to look for her.  
  
He went to the Akabeko, but she wasn't there. Tae told him that the girl had gone hours ago.  
  
Kenshin went round the streets looking for a young woman with long black hair and blue eyes in a violet kimono. Nobody had seen her. He started lo panic. What if she had been attacked? What if she had been kidnapped? What if…?  
  
He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't see a woman in front of him until it was too late. He bumped into her, and the woman fell to the ground.  
  
"Sorry! I didn't… Kaoru-dono!" the samurai suddenly realized who the woman was and helped her stand up. "Sessha was so worried. Why are you here alone? It's very late. You should have…" he shut up as he saw her face.  
  
Her eyes were red, covered with tears. She was shaking, her skin paler than the moon.  
  
"Kaoru-dono! What…what happened?" He felt his heart torn up as more tears fell from her eyes. "Please don't cry…don't cry…" he cleaned her tears with his hands. "What…?"  
  
He couldn't finish his question. She turned her back on him.  
  
"I'm tired Kenshin. I want to go home." She started to walk away from him.  
  
He was shocked, his hand in the air, where her face was. He didn't know what had happened. He only knew that there was something wrong with Kaoru. He had seen so much sadness, so much grief in her eyes… He was so worried that he didn't feel the smile of a wolf who was watching the scene and enjoying the suffering of Batousai…  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
He hugged her.  
  
"Aishiteru."  
  
She was so happy…  
  
"Aishiteru."  
  
She had waited so long for those simple words…  
  
"Aishiteru."  
  
But now it was true. She looked at his violet eyes. She oppened her mouth and started "Aish…" but suddenly stopped when she saw his hands, stained with blood. She looked down and screamed when she saw a mountain of corpses under them. She looked at her kimono, red from the blood in his hands. She looked at him, but she didn't met the kind violet eyes she had seen before, but a pair of cold eyes…amber eyes…  
  
He repeated  
  
"Aishiteru."  
  
She tried to give a step back, but he was holding her very tightly. She screamed  
  
"Let go of me!"  
  
He kissed her  
  
"You should have thought it before falling in love with a hitokiri."  
  
"You're not a hitokiri! You're not an assassin!"  
  
He grinned  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
She screamed as she opened her eyes. It's been a dream. Not a dream- a nightmare. She was sweating and shaking. The door of her room opened and Kenshin went in, frightened.  
  
"Kaoru-dono! What…"  
  
She talked before he could finish his question.  
  
"It's ok, Kenshin, it was just a nightmare. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."  
  
He looked at her, shocked. He tried to open his mouth, but he couldn't say anything.  
  
"Is breakfast ready?"  
  
"H…Hai."  
  
"I'm going in a minute."  
  
The samurai looked at her. He didn't know what to do. He wanted to ask her, but she didn't let him say a word.  
  
"Onegai, go out. I have to change my clothes…"  
  
Kenshin went out of the room, closing the door behind him. Then he heard Kaoru. She was crying. Her cry sounded so hopeless, so painfull… He wanted to go into the room, hold her and tell her not to worry… he wanted to kiss all of her tears…he loved her so much…but he couldn't go there. She had asked him politely to leave her alone. Feeling his heart torn, he started to walk towards the kitchen.  
  
Kenshin knew that there was something wrong with Kaoru's soul. He could feel it, but since she wanted to be alone, there was nothing he could do. The night before he couldn't believe what he was seeing. Her beautiful face was covered with tears. What had happened to make Kaoru cry in that way? When he heard the scream from her room he ran as much as he could. 'It's only a nightmare.' That's what she had said. But the former hitokiri was worried because of that nightmare. She had never had such a terrible dream. He knew it because…because…every night he went into her room only to watch her sleeping. It was such a wonderful feeling…her calm, her quietness, her peace…sometimes she had nightmares, but never one like that, with a scream of pain and sadness which made him remember his own ones.  
  
Yahiko was waiting for them to start having breakfast.  
  
"Oi, Kenshin! Is busu still asleep?" The boy froze as he saw the cold gaze kenshin was giving him.  
  
"Yahiko, sessha would thank you not to tease Kaoru-dono this morning." His voice, usually kind and soft, had got tough, authoritarian…threatening.Yahiko nodded and lowered his head.  
  
"Ohayo!!!! Is breakfast ready? My body is asking me for food!"Sanosuke went into the house grinning. He shut up when he saw the faces of his friends. "What…"  
  
SLAM!!!!!  
  
The men looked at the place where the sound came from. It was Kaoru, going into the room. Her face was red, her eyes avoided the looks from her friends. If Kenshin hadn't warned Yahiko, the boy would have started teasing his master…but nobody had warned Sanosuke.  
  
"Oi, Jo-chan! You look really awful today! You look worse than never!" he grinned as he talked, waiting for Yahiko to join him, but the boy lowered his head. "What…" he looked at Kenshin. His eyes were getting a dangerous colour… "What…" he finally looked at Kaoru. She had her hands hiding her face.  
  
Sanosuke was shocked. Kaoru sighed and lowered her hands. One tear was falling from her eyes.  
  
"I…I'm not hungry. I'll be waiting for you in the dojo Yahiko." She started to go out of the room. Kenshin gave a step forwards to follow her, but she stopped him.  
  
"Onegai, Kenshin. I'm fine, really. Don't follow me."  
  
With those words she went out to the yard, leaving the room full of tension. Sanosuke looked at Kenshin, trying to find the right words.  
  
"I…I'm sorry…I didn't know…"  
  
"Don't worry Sanosuke. It's not your fault de gozaru yo."  
  
Yahiko stood up, still looking down.  
  
"Kenshin" the man looked at the boy "What…what happens with Kaoru? I want to know…"  
  
The samurai was trying to control himself, trying not to go running behind her.  
  
"I wish I knew it Yahiko" was the only answer "I wish I knew…"  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
Several days passed. Kaoru behaved in a very strange ay. She avoided her friends, but especially she avoided Kenshin. He knew it. He tried to talk to her, he tried to make her talk, even a word. But he only got looks full of pain and sadness. Looks hich hid a terrible fight in her heart… a fight between love and hate, sadness, guilty and pain. The pain was killing her heart, her spirit…the pain didn't let her laugh, didn't let her dream, didn't let her live…the only thing she was able to do was having nightmares, night terrors which hounded her soul.  
  
Kenshin decided that it was time to know what was happening to Kaoru. That morning they were alone. He was doing the laundry and she was cleaning the dojo.  
  
Kaoru was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't realize that Kenshin was in front of her.  
  
"Kaoru-dono…sessha thinks it's time to talk."  
  
She raised her sight. The girl didn't know what to do. She couldn't escape, she couldn't hide…she couldn't stop looking at those gold and violet eyes which asked her, begged her for an answer.  
  
She tried to smile.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
He gazed at her.  
  
"Onegai, Kaoru-dono. We are worried about you."  
  
"About me? Why? I'm fine. I don't…" she couldn't stand those eyes. She couldn't. But she couldn't answer his question.  
  
"Onegai."  
  
She stood up. They were gazing at each other's eyes.  
  
"I can't…" she looked away, but Kenshin hold her chin.  
  
"Look at me Kaoru-dono. Why can't you answer me?"  
  
A tear… oh Kami-sama! How often had she cried the last days? Whenever she knew there was nobody looking at her, oceans of tears covered her face. She had always thought that she was strong, that she could find a solution for any problem. But the last events were too difficult for her. The information she had got was so painfull, so terrible, that she couldn't think right…  
  
"Ican't! I CAN'T! Onegai Kenshin…I CAN'T!!!"  
  
Kenshin was still holding her chin.  
  
"Answer me." It was not a question. It was an order.  
  
She released her face, but Kenshin held her by her wrists.  
  
"If you don't tell me why you're afraid I won't be able to protect you."  
  
No more 'sessha'. No more 'dono'. Only a pair of amber eyes, a threatening look.  
  
"The only thing a need protection from is you assassin!!!!!" Kaoru regreted her words in the very moment they went out of her mouth.  
  
'A…assassin? She has called me…?' Kenshin couldn't believe what he had just heard. He didn't know what to do. 'Assassin?' He released her wrists and saw the woman running away from him. 'Assassin. Yes. I'm aassassin. But I had never thought that she…she…assassin …assassin!!!' Voices sounded through his mind. His hand went to his sword, he caught it and hold it.  
  
'ASSASSIN!!!'  
  
Suddenly all covered with blood. Before him ther was a red curtain, red from the blood…his hands were stained with blood. His soul was stained with blood.  
  
'ASSASSIN!!!'  
  
He couldn't react. He could only see the look of hate of Kaoru, her deep blue eyes which used to be full of love, now drown in hate.  
  
'ASSASSIN!!!'  
  
He tried to hide his face behind his hands. The sword fell to the ground.  
  
'ASSASSIN!!!'  
  
Of course he was a slayer. Of course she knew it. But he thought that she accepted him whatever his past was. But those words…  
  
'ASSASSIN!!!'  
  
Those words resounded in his mind. Those words had just destroyed his world. That was the way she saw him, only a…  
  
'ASSASSIN!!!'  
  
"Oh, c'mon Battousai. Don't tell me you're so affected because of the words of a stupid little girl."  
  
Kenshin didn't need to look back to know who had just talked behind him. He didn't need to look back. He knew that if he did it, he would only find the smile of a wolf.  
  
  
  
Notes:  
  
My little glossary (well…more or less…):  
  
Onegai: Please  
  
Tadaima: I'm home.  
  
Dono: Japanese sufix used after names.  
  
Hai: Yes  
  
Chan: another Japanese suffix.  
  
Hitokiri: assassin  
  
Aishiteru: I love you  
  
Busu: ugly. This is how Yahiko calls Kaoru.  
  
Jo-chan: this is how Sanosuke calls Kaoru. It means 'little miss'  
  
Ohayo: good morning.  
  
Well…what do you think? Better? Worse? Is it too long? Too short? Well written? Awfully written? Please reviewwwwwwww!!!! Tell me whatever you want (well…not whatever…). C&C are welcome.  
  
And before going… some people have told me that I've got some (well…more than some ¬¬U) grammatical mistakes. As I said, English is not my first language. The problem is that I don't know anybody who speaks English properly. If any of you wants to volunteer to read the following chapters and correct my mistakes I'd be very really really grateful. If you think you want to do it (please say yes!) e-mail me (or email me… or e mail me…errrr well, whatever, write to me) . ^__^ 


	2. Forgotten voices

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin and its characters belong to Nobuhiro Watsuki, Sueisha, Sony… I'm not trying to make money with this.  
  
Well, here's the second chapter. As I said, there is OOC in this fic. So if you think that Kaoru will always love Kenshin, and that there's no way she hates him… you shouldn't read this. I hope you like it.  
  
Shadows from the past.  
  
Chapter two.  
  
Forgotten voices.  
  
  
  
She ran. There was nothing she could do but running. Running away. Running away… from him.  
  
'How could I? How could I say…? Oh God. How could I call him assassin? I can't believe I told him that… When I remember his eyes, so full of pain, so hurt… How could I call him assassin? How could I hurt the person I care for the most? I would give up my life for him. I want him to be happy, to forget about his past, about his pain… but the only thing I do is adding more suffering. How could I?  
  
I should come back. I should come back and ask him to forgive me. I should tell him that I didn't mean what I said. But I meant it. I should tell him what I feel, that I love him, that I don't care about his past. But I DO care. I love so much that man. I hate so much that assassin. I would never hurt him… I just want him to be happy… I just want him to suffer as much as I did, to shed the tears I shed, to wish death as I wished when… when…  
  
I don't want to hurt him. Another side of me does, another side of me wants to see his suffering, but I won't allow that side to win. I must go away… before I hurt him. I must go away… never come back…'  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
What a strange week. Sanosuke looked at the boy walking beside him. Yahiko hadn't said a word in the whole day. The gangster sighed. What a strange week.  
  
They were coming from the market where Kenshin had sent them. Sano knew that it was only an excuse to be alone with Kaoru. The girl had been behaving in a very strange way for the last week. Always quiet, never shouting, only wanting to be alone. That was not his Jo-chan. What the hell had happened?  
  
Since that morning, the atmosphere in the dojo was very strange. They tried to talk to her, but she always changed the subject, gave them a little smile, and went into the house. Jo-chan…  
  
Yahiko stopped, looking at the ground. Sanosuke looked at him. The boy was also suffering. The girl in the dojo was not his 'Busu'. She was a strange silent woman… He felt so impotent… he tried to make her smile, he even tried to get her angry, but nothing worked. The man put a hand on his shoulder.  
  
"Yahiko… are you all right?"  
  
The boy took a deep breath. "Sano… I'm worried about Kaoru."  
  
The man looked at the boy. Of course he was worried about Jo-chan. Everybody was worried about her. He waited for the young samurai to continue.  
  
"When she thinks she's alone… well, I hear her."  
  
The man narrowed his eyes. "You hear her… what?"  
  
"…crying…"  
  
Sanosuke was still looking at the boy. "Crying?"  
  
He nodded. "She cries everyday. In the nights it's worse. I've often heard the nightmares Kenshin has, but Kaoru… her nightmares are worse."  
  
The former gangster frowned. "Are you sure Yahiko?"  
  
He raised his sight, angry. "Of course I'm sure! I know what I hear… what I see…"  
  
"What you see?"  
  
He nodded again. "I don't know why… but she avoids being alone with Kenshin. She doesn't talk to him, she doesn't look at him…" the boy looked at the river "I'd like to know what's the matter with her…"  
  
Sanosuke started to walk towards the dojo, followed by Yahiko. All that thing was very strange. Avoiding Kenshin? Crying? Nightmares? Where was the annoying girl they missed?  
  
Yahiko suddenly stopped, pointing at the bridge.  
  
"Sano!! Look!!!!"  
  
Standing on the railings of the bridge was a young woman gazing at the river.  
  
"JO-CHAN??!!"  
  
They threw what they had in their hands and ran towards the bridge. Once they got there, they slowly got closer to the woman.  
  
"Jo-chan…what are you doing?". Sanosuke was trying to hide his nervousness. "You may fall if you're not careful…"  
  
She answered without moving her head, her eyes still in the water. "I thought that if I died my suffering would end… but I realized that it would only make Kenshin suffer. And I don't want him to suffer…" she turned to look at her friends "…do I?"  
  
The man and the boy were speechless, looking at her. Slowly, Kaoru went down of the railings. "I have to go. Goodbye."  
  
Any of them knew what to do. She had to go… where? The dojo was in the opposite direction. "Ka-Kaoru… where are you going to?"  
  
She didn't stop walking. "I don't know" was her answer "far… away…"  
  
Then she heard a voice behind her. A voice she hadn't heard for a long time. She turned and saw a beautiful woman with black long hair and a pair of deep blue eyes. Everything vanished. There was only darkness and pain.  
  
That voice… what had it said? It had said… "Imouto-san…"  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
"I'm not interested in what you have to say, so go away Saitou."  
  
Kenshin bent down to pick up his sword. After what had happened, the last thing he wanted to hear was the voice of the wolf. He never brought good news.  
  
Saitou smirked. "Where are your good manners Battousai?"  
  
The samurai looked at the man behind him. Saitou Hajime. That man always chose the worst occasions to appear. "What do you want?"  
  
The man gave a step forwards. "Maybe you want to know why the young Kamiya has been behaving in such a strange way lately, Battousai."  
  
His eyes widened, his hand went to his sword. "What have you done to her?" Suddenly eveything was clear. Saitou. He had done something to Kaoru.  
  
Saitou took a cigarette from his pocket and lit it. "The question should be… what have you done to her?"  
  
Kenshin was shocked. "What?"  
  
The smoke started to spread between them. "I got some information and I thought she would like to know it."  
  
"Know what."  
  
"Oh, something really interesting, Battousai. Really interesting."  
  
Kenshin was starting to get tired of the riddle. "My patience is wearing thin Saitou. What did you tell her?"  
  
Saiyou was really enjoying the conversation. "Before I answer, I've got one question for you, Battousai. Do you really know Kaoru Kamiya?"  
  
Kenshin was puzzled. What kind of question was that?  
  
"What do you kow about her life before you met her, Battousai? What do you know about her family?"  
  
The samurai stared at the wolf. "Not much. I only know that her mother died when she was little, and his father a few years ago. Why?"  
  
"What about the rest of her family?"  
  
"Teh rest of her family? What do you mean?"  
  
"Just what I thought." Saitou went out of the house, leaving a speechless Kenshin behind him. "If the girl didn't want to tell you the story, I shouldn't be the one to do it."  
  
Kenshin followed him to the street. "What did you tell her?"  
  
Saitou went on walking. "Maybe any other day Battousai."  
  
"Saitou!!!!!"  
  
"Kenshin! Kenshin!!!"  
  
The samurai looked behind him. It was Yahiko, running towards him, sweating and breathing hardly. "Kenshin!!!"  
  
"What happens Yahiko?"  
  
"Kenshin! It's Kaoru! She's at the clinic with Megumi! Hurry up!"  
  
"Kaoru-dono…" Kenshin ran as fast as he could. Everything was clear now. Saitou. Saitou was to blame. If he had hurt Kaoru… If he had dared lay a finger on her…  
  
  
  
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Sanosuke was outside the room where Kaoru rested. The door of the clinic suddenly opened, showing a short man with long red hair, a scar in his left cheek and a pair of violet and amber eyes looking for someone…  
  
"Sano!" Kenshin went into the clinic followed by Yahiko. "Sano what happened? Where's Kaoru-dono?"  
  
Sanosuke caught the man by his gi. "Well Kenshin, I want an answer and I want it NOW. What the hell is happening here?" The gangster was in a really bad mood. He wanted to know the truth.  
  
Kenshin looked at his friend. "I don't know Sano. The only thing I know is that Saitou has to do with it."  
  
His eyes widened. "Saitou?!"  
  
"Please, Sano. What happened?" The samurai was trying to control himself. He wanted to talk to Kaoru. This time she would have to answer.  
  
Sanosuke released him. "We found her in the bridge. She was about to kill herself."  
  
"WHAT?!"  
  
"She said that she didn't want you to suffer, and then she fainted. It was as if she had seen a ghost."  
  
He looked at Yahiko, who nodded. "It's true. I was there."  
  
Kenshin was shocked. Kaoru had tried to commit suicide? Why?! It didn't make sense.  
  
The door of the room opened. Megumi went out and looked at the three men. Kenshin tried to go into the room, but the doctor stopped him.  
  
"Megumi-dono…"  
  
"Kaoru-san is fine, Kenshin…"  
  
Kenshin knew taht something was wrong. By the tone of her voice there was only one word which could be said.  
  
"…but…"  
  
Kenshin closed his eyes. 'But.'  
  
Megmi took them to another room. She sat, waiting for the others to do the same, but Kenshin remained standing. The doctor sighed. "Kenshin, please, sit down." He nodded.  
  
The men were looking at her, waiting for the doctor to tell them what had happened. She knew it, but she didn't know how to say what she had to say.  
  
"As I said, Kaoru-san is fine. She doesn't have any injuries, any bruises, she's perfect… physically."  
  
Kenshin narrowed his eyes. "Megumi-dono what do you mean?"  
  
The doctor looked at the man. "I mean what I said. There's no need to worry about her body. But I'm afraid I can't say the same about her mind."  
  
The room was silent. Nobody dared ask… nobody wanted to know…  
  
"I wasn't able to wake her up. I've used everything I know, but it looks like she doesn't want to wake up." Megumi bit her lower lip.  
  
Silence again.  
  
"But…" Yahiko was trying not to cry, he wanted to be strong, for Kaoru, and for himself. "But… there must be something you can give her to wake her up… I mean, some medicine or somtheng like that…"  
  
The woman shook her head. "I've tried, Yahiko. But it was useless. She's still asleep."  
  
Kenshin was about to ask something, but a scream stopped him. It came from another room. The samurai stood up and ran to the room where Kaoru was sleeping. 'Kaoru-dono!'  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
She shouldn't be there. That woman shouldn't be there. Why? Why had she come back? She had forgotten her. She only brought sad memories to her mind. She didn't want to remember. Not again…  
  
The woman looked angry. "I thought you loved me."  
  
The girl was shocked. "But… but… I love you!"  
  
The woman shook her head. "I don't believe in you."  
  
The girl screamed. "But… it's the truth!"  
  
The woman closed her eyes. "Then… why did you betray me?"  
  
The girl was now crying. "I didn't betray you!"  
  
The woman gazed at the girl's eyes. "Did you keep your promise?"  
  
The girl lowered her head. "No…"  
  
The woman now looked sad. "Why?"  
  
The girl raised her head. "I… I… I can't!"  
  
The woman started to walk away from the girl. "Then you don't love me."  
  
The girl ran after her. "No! Please forgive me! I can't! Forgive me! Don't leave me alone! Please! Not again! No!"  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
Kenshin opened the door. Kaoru was in the bed, asleep, but trembling and talking in dreams.  
  
"Forgive me! Please! Forgive me… don't… please…"  
  
Her voice was faltering. Her face was covered by sweat and tears. She started to calm down. Her words turned into murmurs before stopping. "Forgive me… oneesan…"  
  
Sanosuke and Yahiko watched the scene from the door. Megumi, next to the bed, tried to calm the girl. Kenshin was in the centre of the room, looking at the her. 'Forgive me…' who had to forgive her? What had he done which needed forgiveness? But there was something which had surprised him more than any other thing. She… she had said…  
  
"She said… oneesan?" Yahiko, still outside the room, had heard her words.  
  
They were shocked. Kaoru… had a sister? She had never talked of anything like that. When she talked about her family she only mentioned her parents. 'She has got a sister?' Kenshin didn't understand anything. 'A sister? Where?'. Then he looked at Megumi.  
  
"Megumi-dono, where's doctor Genzai?"  
  
She looked at the man, angry. "Kenshin, as I told you, there's nothing we can do until she wakes up,and…"  
  
"No, that's not what I mean" Kenshin shook his head. "Genzai-sensei knows Kaoru-dono since she was little. I'd like to make him some questions."  
  
Kaoru sighed from the bed. Another tear fell from her eyes. "Forgive me… oneesan…"  
  
  
  
  
  
Notes:  
  
My little gossary (more or less…):  
  
Imoutosan: younger sister  
  
Oneesan: elder sister  
  
Dono: Japanese suffix. Means mr., mrs., ms.  
  
Sensei: Japanese suffix which means doctor or master.  
  
San: yes, another Japanese suffix.  
  
Jo-chan: this is how Sanosuke calls Kaoru. It means 'little miss'.  
  
Busu: this is how Yahiko calls Kaoru. It means 'ugly'.  
  
Well, what do you think? Please, review or e-mail!!! C&C are welcome. ^__^ 


	3. Memories

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin belongs to Nobuhiro Watsuki, Shueisha, Sony…  
  
Well, here is the third chapter. As I said before, OOC. Enjoy.  
  
"…" Talking  
  
'…' Thinking  
  
······ Flashback  
  
Shadows form the past.  
  
Chapter three.  
  
Memories.  
  
  
  
The old man looked through the window. The last rays of sunlight illuminated the room. His right hand went to his beard, while his left one held a cup of tea.  
  
Silence.  
  
Only the heavy breath of a woman disturbed the silence. The man lowered his gaze to the woman. She was lying on a futon, sleeping. Dreaming. But her dreams were not pleasant. She was pale, sweat covered her faace, and her body was shaking and trembling, trying to fight something he knew quite well. The man closed his eyes as long ago forgotten memories came back to his mind.  
  
Itami. Pain. Never a name had suited a woman as Itami suited his granddaughter.  
  
Itami.  
  
Just like her youngr sister, Itami was a beautiful girl with black hair and deep blue eyes. Just like her younger sister, Itami had been the most beautiful swordswoman in Edo. But, unlike her younger sister, Itami didn't believe in her father's technique. The sword was a weapon for her, only made to kill, not to protect.  
  
Itami.  
  
Now nobody remembers her. Nobody wants to remember. Especially Kaoru; she had buried those sad memories deep in her mind. Now he had to recall all those memories. Memories…  
  
"Genzai-sensei". Behind him a young man tried to bring him back to reality.  
  
Kenshin had always been a patient man. He would have preferred waiting for Kaoru to wake up and tell them what they needed to know. But something told him that she wouldn't want to talk about that. He had waited for Enishi's Jinchuu to tell his friends about Tomoe; if he hadn't been forced to tell them the story, probably the others wouldn't know anything about his dead wife yet.  
  
The old doctor turned around. In front of the sleeping gril, two men, a boy and a woman waited for his answers. They needed to know. They had to know. They were her friends- no, her family.  
  
Doctor Genzai took a deep breath and sat. It would be a long story.  
  
"I had a daughter, Hana Genzai. She was beautiful and many men tried to marry her. but it was a young man who owned her heart, Tetsuro Kamiya. I had known his family for a long time, and I really thought they would be a happy couple. A few months after their marriage, she got pregnant. But she was very weak; during the birth she lost a lot of blood. She didn't survive. The baby did; it was the first daughter of Tetsuro Kamiya, Itami Kamiya.  
  
"Tetsuro said that he would never love a woman as much as he had loved my daughter. And he didn't. But he was forced to marry again; his family had arranged a marriage with a young girl from a rich family. She was called Kieko. Tetsuro didn't like the idea of living with another woman, but his family persuaded him to marry her because Itami would need a mother. Finally, Tetsuro agreed. Kieko always trated Itami as her own daughter, and for the little girl, Kieko was the only mother she had ever known.  
  
"Years passed, but Kieko didn't get pregnant. I thought that they might be some problem with her so I asked her when was the last time they had tried to have children. The answer froze me. They have never tryed to, because they slept in different rooms.  
  
················································  
  
"Kieko…"  
  
A woman was sat on the porch of the house. She was beautiful. Her hair, deep dark, fell from her head to the floor, some locks lying on her shoulders. Her eyes, even darker, were lost in the horizon. Dark eyes full of pain and sadness.  
  
"Kieko… I didn't know…"  
  
"It's allright Genzai-sensei." She replied with a sad smile. "You don't have to worry about me". She lowered her gaze. "There's no need ot worry about me."  
  
"Don't say that, Kieko." The old man was shocked due to what he had just heard. "Tetsuro has no right…"  
  
"Tetsuro has every right." Was her answer. "I'm his wife and I will do whatever he wants me to."  
  
A little girl about seven was playing in the garden in front of them. She had black hair like her mother and deep blue eyes like her father. "Mom! Grandpa! Look a butterfly!" the girl giggled and ran after the butterfly, trying to catch it. "Fly, fly, Butterfly!" She giggled again.  
  
The doctor stood up. "I'm going to talk to him."  
  
"No!" Kieko tried to stop him. "If you do that he will get angry."  
  
He felt the sadness in her voice. He couldn't stand it anymore. "When Hana died, I went on with my life, for my family. He has to understand that he's not to blame for the death of my daughter. He has to live for his family."  
  
Kieko looked at Itami, who was still trying to catch the butterfly. "Arigato, Genzai-sensei."  
  
···············································  
  
"Itami was eight when the second daughter of Tetsuro Kamiya was born. Kaoru Kamiya.  
  
"Meanwhile, Tetsuro had been training Itami. The girl was very good and soon she learnd the basic movements of the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu. Tetsuro trated her daughter like the most beautiful creature in the world, like an angel. Everything Itami wanted, she had it. But Kaoru wasn't so lucky."  
  
Behind them Kaoru groaned. They turned to look at her, but she was still sleeping. The flame of the candle which illuminated the room twinkled. Genzai closed the window and looked through it again. A white fullmoon brighted in the dark sky. White surrounded by dark… like Itami's face surrounded by her hair… like Kaoru's face surrounded by her hair… so pale…  
  
"Itami was the daughter of the woman Tetsuro had loved with all his heart. Kaoru was the daughter of the woman who took care of Itami. Kaoru was a burden for him, and he never trated her like his daughter. Never a smile, never a kind word. The honorable man I had known and loved as a son had died with my daughter. But Kaoru really loved his father. She tried her best to do all he wanted, but it was always wrong. Tetsuro used to tell her that she wasn't his daughter because she didn't deserve it."  
  
Another groan, a low scream. Kenshin looked at her pale face, covered by sweat and tears. It was… impossible. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. How could her own father trate her like that? 'Why? Kaoru doesn't deserve being trated like a burden. She's not a burden. She is…' The light pale of the moon made her face glow '…an angel.'  
  
"Her relationship with Itami was different. Kaoru was her beloved little sister, and Itami always protected her. They were always together. Itami always defended Kaoru and Kieko when Tetsuro despised them. They were her mother and her sister, and she didn't like the way her father trated them. Tetsuro usually said that Kieko wasn't her mother, but it only made her angrier.  
  
"By the time Itami was fourteen, she was one of the best swordswomen in Edo. Everybody knew about her, and Tetsuro was very proud. He loved his daughter. But she hated him. She hated him for all the times he had despised Kieko and Kaoru, and for all the times she hadn't been able to defend them. One night she exploded…  
  
·······················································  
  
"I don't believe in your Kamiya Kasshin Ryu! It's a hypocritical technique! You are a hypocritical bastard!!"  
  
Tetsuro couldn't believe what he was hearing. His Itami, his little angel, was shouting at him, and had called him bastard?!  
  
"You say that it's 'the sword that protects life', but it's not ture! You don't protect life! You destroy it!"  
  
Hidden in the corner of the room, Kieko embraced her daughter Kaoru. The little girl, who was only seven, was crying. Tetsuro had shouted at her because she had dropped a bottle of sake.  
  
The man looked at Itami. "What do you mean? I've never killed anybody."  
  
She cried louder. "You kill! You kill mom and Kaoru every time you despise them! You…"  
  
"Itami, Kieko is not your mother."  
  
"Kieko IS my mother! Kaoru IS my sister! You are nothing to me! I don't believe in your technique! Swords kill, and you haven't proved the opposite!"  
  
Itami took her sister by the hand and went outside. Tetsuro tried to stop her. "When are you going?"  
  
"I'm going for a walk with Kaoru."  
  
The little girl was still sobbing when they arrived to the river. Then she stopped. The scene in front of her was wonderful. Hundreds of fireflies danced aroun them, glowing in the darkness. Itami kneeled down and looked at her sister. She hugged her.  
  
"My little Kaoru… I'm sorry. I have to go."  
  
Kaoru's eyes widened. "Go? Where?"  
  
"I don't know. I have to go far from this house. Kaoru, you're too young to understand, but I need some answers and I know I won't find them here."  
  
"But- you can't leave me!" Kaoru started to cry again. "Who will defend me? Who will be with me? I need you! Don't leave…"  
  
Itami held her sister tighter. "I'm sorry. You will have to get stronger. But I know you are able to do it. I trust you." She stood up and walked away. Her slim form soon disappeared in the darkness.  
  
Kaoru fell to the groun, crying. She was alone. For the first time in her life. Alone. "Itami…"  
  
·················································  
  
Kenshin lowered his head. The scene doctor Genzai had just described was so familiar…  
  
The old man drank some of his tea before going on. "Kaoru didn't want to go back home, so she came here and told me what had happened. First I lost my daughter, then my granddaughter… so many losses… but for Kaoru it was worse. When Kieko knew what had happened, she fell ill, and she was always in bed. Tetsuro blamed Kaoru for not stopping Itami, and he decided to ignore her. Her mother was ill, her father didn't want to talk to her and her sister had disappeared. Kaoru was alone. Every day, she went to the same place, next to the river, waiting for Itami to come back. But Itami never came.  
  
"Two years passed, but Itami was still a mistery. Finally, one night one messenger told them what we had been fearing since her disappearance. Itami had died. When Kieko heard it, her heart stopped. She died. Tetsuro shut himself in his room. I tried to talk to him, but he refused to talk. While I was trying these, somebody knocked at the door. Kaoru oppened it… and…" Genzai couldn't go on. He tried to fight back the tears, but he couldn't find his voice. Why? Why had he to remember this? He was so tired… "…there was nobody at the door. Only something… at first, Kaoru didn't know what it was, but when she got closer she reliazed that the… 'thing' lying on the floor was Itami… all covered with blood. What happened afterwards, I wouldn't believe it if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes. But I saw it. Kaoru caught her sister's body and took it to her mother's room, leaving it next to Kieko. She was all covered with the blood of Itami. Then she entered her father's room and told him that she wanted to learn Kamiya Kasshin Ryu. Without a word, Tetsuro stood up and went to the dojo, followed by Kaoru. He gave her a bokken and started with the first lesson."  
  
Genzai left his cup on a table. "I don't know what happened in those two years. I don't know how Itami died. But I know that Kaoru forgot everything. I can't understand why she's remembering again."  
  
They were all silent. Only Yahiko find the strengh to say something. "How… how could she forget that?"  
  
"Memories are ghosts. Some people face tehir ghosts and defeat them. Some people face their ghosts but are defeated, and they have to live with them. Some people try to run away form thir ghosts. But no matter how deep you think you've buried them in your mind, memories always come back to haunt you." Everybody looked at Kenshin as he talked. "Always…"  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
The glow of the candle was the only light in the darkness. But it started to fade. Kenshin tried to keep the light in the dark room by replacing the old candle with a new one. The new candle brighted intensely; it was not a simple glow, but a really bright light. Kenshin was surprised. How could such a little flame light a room which was absolutely dark? That new flame guided him in the darkness. And he knew that he would do anything to keep that light brighting for him. His light…  
  
Sanosuke and Yahiko had fallen asleep in a corner of the room. Megumi was looking after a patient in another room. Doctor Genzai had gone back home with the girls. Only Kenshin remained in the same place, in the same position, sat with his back to Kaoru. He hadn't made a move, excepting when he had changed the candles. The man was staring at the light, which danced and twinkled, mesmerizing…  
  
His mind wasn't in that room. His mind was in the bright smile of a young woman… in the seas of her eyes… in the snow of her skin… in the eternal darkness of her hair… in her beautiful face… in her wonderful soul…  
  
Her smile seemed so innocent. So pure. Was it possible that her smile was only a façade? Only… something to hide the pain in her soul. A smile which hid the soul of a child who had nver been a child. A smile… just like Soujiro's… just like… 'mine…'  
  
"K-Ken… shin…"  
  
The faint voice behind him made him turn around. "Kaoru-dono."  
  
"Kenshin where are we?"  
  
He smiled. "We're at the clinic."  
  
"The clinic?" She sat up, fightened. "Why? What happened? Who…"  
  
"Hush". Kenshin took her cold hand. "You fainted and Sano brought you here."  
  
Kaoru was now confused. She had fainted? When? She had seen Sano… where? Oh, yes, at the bridge. She had fainted because she had… seen…  
  
She couldn't breath. She needed air. Air! She had seen Itami. But Itami was dead. Itami was a memory that Kaoru had long ago buried in her mind. She didn't want to remember. Why had she remembered? She was in the street and she met… Saitou… who told her… who showed her…  
  
"No" Kaoru clutched her head. "No!"  
  
Kenshin tried ot calm her. "Kaoru-dono! What…"  
  
"No! I don't want to remember! I don't want to remember!"  
  
Her screams woke up Sano and Yahiko. Megumi ran to the room. When she went in, she saw Kaoru sat on the futon, held by Kenshin. The doctor got closer to the couple. "Kaoru-san…"  
  
Kaoru looked up. "I… sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you." She lowered her sight to her hands.  
  
"Kaoru-dono."  
  
She couldn't look at him. Not now. Not yet.  
  
"Kaoru-dono, Saitou went to the dojo this morning."  
  
Her breath stopped. Saitou had gone… why? He had told Kenshin…  
  
"We need to know what Saitou told you, Kaoru-dono."  
  
No, he hadn't told Kenshin. But she wouldn't talk either. If she told him what she knew, everything would collapse. He would go. She would be alone again. Loneliness again. And tears. And nightmares. And hate. And pain. Again. Not again. No more. She couldn't talk. Please, not again… not again…  
  
Kenshin couldn't stand the silence anymore. "Is it related to Itami?"  
  
Kaoru stood up, shocked and scared. "Wh-what do you know about Itami?"  
  
"Doctor Genzai told us about her." Kenshin talked as he stood up. "About her death."  
  
The room started spinning. She was sweating. Her skin was getting paler. She felt her legs too weak to support her. Kenshin knew that she had a sister. Kenshin knew that she had died. Kenshin knew that she had been killed. But Kenshin didn't know…  
  
"Did Saitou tell you something related to your sister's death?"  
  
She couldn't breath. She needed air. 'No more questions… please, Kenshin… don't ask…' "Please, no…" 'You don't want to know…'  
  
"Who killed your sister? Was it Saitou?"  
  
"No…"  
  
"Who killed Itami, Kaoru-dono?"  
  
"No… No!"  
  
Kenshin knew that the answer was close. He also knew that he was making Kaoru suffer, but when he got the answer he was looking for, he would make the reponsible pay for all her pain. It was a promise. A promise to punish the one who had done that.  
  
To punish with all the strengh of Battousai.  
  
"Who killed your sister?"  
  
"No!"  
  
"Who killed Itami?"  
  
"NO!"  
  
"WHO!"  
  
She looked at him for the first time in several days. His eyes widened. 'No…' The answer was in her breath. 'No…' The answer was in her face. 'No…' The answer was in her eyes. 'No…' The same look… 'the same look than… Enishi… no… no…' Kenshin gave a step backwards. 'No… please Kami… no…' He couldn't take his eyes away from hers. 'No…'  
  
The words that had been buried in her soul exploded with her. "BATTOUSAI!!!"  
  
Her scream broke his heart. 'No…'  
  
"Battousai! Battousai killed my sister! Battousai killed my mother! Battousai destroyed my family! Battousai destroyed the only thing that made me live! Battousai destroyed my life!"  
  
Those words hit them with all the strength of her soul. His fight with Saito… with Aoshi… Soujiro… Shishio… Enishi… the pain he received in those fights was nothing compared to the pain that was tearing him apart. The words of hate. The words of revenge. His past had haunted him again. Again. 'No…' He couldn't move. He couldn't think. He was frozen. 'No…'  
  
Then he remembered Saitou's words… 'The question should be… what have you done to her, Battousai?'  
  
  
  
  
  
My little glossary:  
  
Itami: pain.  
  
Sensei: doctor, professor.  
  
Dono: polite suffix  
  
San: suffix.  
  
Arigato: thanks.  
  
Kamiya Kasshin Ryu: Kaoru's technique.  
  
Bokken: wooden sword.  
  
What do you think? Please, Review!!!!!! Oh, and about Tetsuro, If you have seen Seisouhen, in the first chapter, when Kenshin asks Kaoru about her father, she says that he was very stirct and her mother used to cry a lot. That's why Tetsuro behaves like that in this chapter.  
  
Thanks for you reviews!!!!! They make me very happy!!!!!!! And, Rin, you asked me if I speak Spanish… Bueno, soy española, así que lo hablo bastante bien ^__^ . Por eso tengo algunos… pequeños… errores cuando escribo en inglés. Los idiomas no son lo mío… 


	4. Wipe my tears away

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin belongs to Nobuhiro Watsuki, Sony… I'm not trying to make money with this.  
  
Hello minna! ^___^ Here it's the fourth chapter. I hope you like it. Please, read and review!  
  
  
  
Shadows form the past.  
  
Chapter Four.  
  
Wipe my tears away.  
  
  
  
He didn't want to believe it. He had killed her sister. He mother had died. She was alone. And it was all his fault. All her pain was his fault. All her sadness, his fault.  
  
Kenshin felt something wer in his cheek. He was… crying? When was the last time he had cried? He had almost forgotten the wet feeling in his face.  
  
He fell to the floor and buried his face in his hands. Hands stained again. Another tear. What should he say? What should he do? Apologize? No. It would be useless. There was no word which could express what he was feeling. He wanted to scream. He wanted to die. Why? Another tear. Why?  
  
When he killed he didn't see his victims like people, but like the enemy. If he had seen husbands, fathers, brothers, sons, he would have gone insane. That's why he needed the hitokiri. A side of him which could look at a man and kill him even before the victim could feel the pain. A side of him that had never cried.  
  
Until now.  
  
When he raised his head and opened his eyes, Kaoru's hand flew to her mouth. His eyes weren't violet. They were absolutely amber. And he was crying. For the first time in his life, Battousai was crying.  
  
The others were motionless. The words they had just heard were impossible to believe. They saw Kenshin collapsing, crying.  
  
Something inside Kaoru's mind made her realize what she had just done. She had destroyed him. She could see all the pain and the regret in his eyes, all the guilt. She realized that she had made a huge mistake. Now, seeing him like that… she couldn't go on. When she knew that her sister had been killed, she blamed her assassin for what had happened afterwards. She needed somenone to blame. But it was unfair. She knew Kenshin. She knew that he woke up every day with the faces of his victims in his mind. She knew that he had suffered enough for a lifetime. It was unfair! Why Kenshin? Why did the Gods hate them so much?  
  
His mind was collapsing. Every pillar which kept him from going mad was falling down. Now he really was 'sessha'. He really was unworthy of everything. Of having a family, of loving, of being loved, of living. He was worthy of one thing: pain. That was what he deserved. Pain and nothing else. He had destroyed her life. Now there was no point in going on. There was no point in pretending that he could live a normal life, being happy with his family. He would never have a normal life. He didn't deserve it.  
  
There was one last pillar. If it fell down, there would be nothing. Rakuninmura would be the Paradise compared with what his life would became if that last pillar fell. She was his last pillar. She. His light. A faint voice in his mind tried to call her… 'Please… don't leave me… this time…' but he silenced the voice. He didn't deserve being saved.  
  
'Is this what I want for him? Will I feel better if he destroys himself? Is this what I want?' the answer came as fast as the questions. 'No'. Her mind tried to find a solution. 'I have to do something… anything…' There was no time for thinking. She had to act. She kneeled down in front of him. His golden gaze was lost somewhere behind her. 'It's not what I want for him. What do I want?' She didn't hesitate, and before she realized what she was doing, she wrapped her arms around him.  
  
"Sorry".  
  
Kenshin binked. Once, twice. She had just said… 'sorry'? She?! Why was she hugging him? She shouldn't. He didn't deserve it. She had said it herself, he had killed her sister, he had destroyed her life. Only a kind soul like her would try to comfort him in that moment. But he didn't deserve that comfort.  
  
Her mouth was next to his ear, so that he could be the only one to hear her words. "I'm sorry. I've been selfish. I was thinking only about me. Only me and my pain. I didn't think about you. Sorry"  
  
He tried to speak, but his troath didn't allow him to do it. His hands were resting at his sides. He still couldn't belive what was happening. It was so… unreal.  
  
"I may have suffered, but I know that you have suffered more than me, more than anybody else. You've suffered enough. I've been in both sides. I've been supporting you when somebody came looking for revenge. And now I know what those people felt. I'm sorry, Kenshin. When I knew… I let my rage and my pain control me. I'm not better than the other people. I needed someone to blame… and I blamed you.  
  
"It was unfair. I know your pain. I see it everyday. In your acts, in the way you do everything, in the way you talk, in the way you live". She pulled away to look at his eyes. "In your eyes". She wiped away one of his tears. "Your eyes…"  
  
His eyes. His eyes showed the pain which was tearing him apart. The sorrow which was drowning his heart. The guilt which was destroying him.  
  
She waited for him to say something, but his gaze was still lost. His amber eyes were still crying. She had tried to bring him back, but it was late. She had lost him. He was lost.  
  
"I'm so sorry…" Tears began to fall from her eyes "… Kenshin…"  
  
Then, for the first time in what seemed to be hours, his mouth moved. "Don't…"  
  
He was still there! She tried to stop her tears without succes. He was still there!  
  
He tied again. "Don't… cry…" His right hand went to her face. "Please… don't… I…"  
  
She gasped. Ore. "Kenshin…" Her left hand went to his.  
  
"Don't cry… Don't leave… Please…" His eyes were still lost, but he was there.  
  
She embraced him again. "Kenshin…"  
  
He rested his head on her shoulder and closed his eyes as one last tear fell. "Don't…"  
  
The room grew silent. Megumi remained at the door; Sano and Yahiko were still on the corner. In the centre of the room, Kaoru hugged Kenshin and rocked him back and forth, rubbing his back. It had been close. Too close. If she had hesitated, he would be dead. Not his body, but his mind, his soul. And she felt it was all because of her. 'I'm stupid. Stupid. After all we've lived together, after all he's done for me, for everybody, after all his suffering, it's me, the stupid girl, who almost destroy him. Stupid. I should try to think before opening my mouth, but I'm too stupid to do that'. She cried harder. 'I've almost destroyed him!' All the hate she had felt against him a few minutes ago had turned to hate against herself in one second. 'I was so wrong… so wrong… He gave me a family, someone to love. And what do I give back to him? Pain. Stupid'.  
  
His breath was softer. He was sleeping. Without loosening the embrace, she lay him on the futon. She lay beside him. Soon, she was also asleep.  
  
Yahiko looked at the embraced couple. He got closer to Sanosuke and whispered "What do we do now?"  
  
Sanosuke stood up slowly and gestured him to do the same. "Now we go".  
  
They left the room, forgeting to blew the candle out. The light flickered twice, but kept on brighting.  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
Kenshin opened his eyes and blinked. Where was he? It wasn't his room. He tried to move, but he couldn't. 'It's strange…' But the most strange thing was that he hadn't had a nightmare. There was neither blood nor screams. Only silence.  
  
As he focused his eyes he could see something a few inches away from him. That… 'something' was embracing him. That something had the most beautiful face he had ever seen. That something talked.  
  
"Ohayou Kenshin".  
  
He smiled. "Ohayou Kaoru".  
  
He tried to think. 'Okay. I'm in a bed. With Kaoru. And we are embraced…' Well, there was nothing wrong with that, was it? 'W-Wait… I'm in a bed… with Kaoru…we are embraced… oh my…!' he quickly sat up and discovered, to his relief, that he was absolutely dressed in his pink gi and white hakama, and Kaoru was fully dressed in a lovely blue kimono.  
  
Kenshin shook his head. "Kaoru… what are we doing here?"  
  
The woman looked at him, startled. 'Kaoru!?! He has dropped the –dono!?! He doesn't know what happened!?!' Kaoru tried to understand him. "What do you mean?"  
  
"Well…" the samurai blushed. "…why are we… together… in a bed?"  
  
Kaoru was puzzled. "You don't remember?"  
  
"Remember what?"  
  
She couldn't believe what she was hearing. 'He doesn't remember? Should I tell him- of course not!' She stood up and held out her hand to help him. "Ano… why don't we go back home, Kenshin?"  
  
He looked at her and smiled. "I'll do whatever you want Kaoru".  
  
Now it was her turn to blush. She liked this new Kenshin. She liked the way he called her 'Kaoru'. And he had smiled! A real smile, not a simple façade!  
  
Outside the room, Megumi tried to think what she should do. Should she go into the room? What if…? No, it was impossible! Well, she's the doctor, right? And she needs to know the state of her patients… When she was about to enter, the door opened and a smiling Kenshin received her, followed by a startled Kaoru.  
  
"Ohayou Megumi-dono".  
  
The doctor was astonished. "O-Ohayou. Where are you going?"  
  
Kenshin walked towards the main door. "Kaoru wants to go home".  
  
Megumi tried to stop them. "What? But you shouldn't be… I mean, Kaoru-san is…"  
  
"I'm fine Megumi. We'll be right. By the way, where are Sanosuke and Yahiko?"  
  
"I sent them back to the dojo".  
  
Kaoru bowed. "Thanks Megumi. If you need something we'll be at home".  
  
Kenshin bowed and went out.  
  
Megumi stood still for several minutes, or hours, trying to find out if that had really happened or she was still sleeping. It was very strange.  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
They walked in silent next to the river. Kaoru tried not to look to puzzled. Kenshin didn't remember what had happened the day before. Well, it was good, ne? But how much had he forgotten? Suddenly she felt something on her hand.  
  
His hand.  
  
She looked at his face and met the most loving gaze she had seen in her life. She blushed and bowed her head.  
  
It couldn't be wrong, ne?  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
They arrived home, but it was empty. Kenshin went to the kitchen, while Kaoru went to her room to change her clothes. When she went back to the kitchen, breakfast was ready. She sat next to Kenshin.  
  
The samurai leaned forward and whispered in her ear. "Beautiful".  
  
*Blush*  
  
They started to eat in silent. 'Why… What… I mean, not that I'm complaining but… it's very strange…'  
  
In that moment, Sano and Yahiko entered the room. The last thing they thought they would find there was a blushing Kaoru and a happy Kenshin having breakfast as if it was the most ordinary day in their lives.  
  
"What are you doing here?"  
  
Kenshin pointed at his bowl. "Having breakfast".  
  
Sanosuke and Yahiko looked at each other in disbelief.  
  
"Are you hungry?"  
  
They nodded and sat. Everything seemed right. Yahiko sighed. "Well, I thought that after what happened last night… you know, about Itami and all the stuff, you two would be…"  
  
A pair of chopsticks fell to the floor, followed by a bowl of rice.  
  
Itami.  
  
Kenshin stood up.  
  
"Kenshin… what are you doing?"  
  
Kenshin stopped before going out of the room. "I need to think Kaoru-dono".  
  
Kaoru gasped. 'Dono'.  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
'What-What's wrong with me? I forgot everything. I forgot. It's impossible. It's… I … I can't go on. I have to go. I… What was I thinking? What's wrong with me?'  
  
He walked. He was thinking about what had happened that morning, but his mind went suddenly blank, and he just walked. He proferred not to think. Not to know. Not to remember. He let his feet head him wherever they wanted to go. Where did they want to go?  
  
Home.  
  
Before he realized what he was doing, he went into the house, right to his room. There was somebody inside. He carefully opened the paper door. A woman was sat on his futon.  
  
"Kaoru-dono".  
  
The woman turned round. She was crying. When she saw the man at the door, she quickly stood up and run to him. "Kenshin!" She wrapped her arms around him, and her tears fell to his chest. "I thought you had gone…"  
  
The samurai closed his eyes. "Don't worry Kaoru-dono. I'm going."  
  
She pulled away. "What do you mean?"  
  
Kenshin sighed. "I'm going. Sessha wa rurouni… remember?"  
  
Her eyes widened. He wanted to go? Why?! "Why?!"  
  
"I can't be here any longer. I can't be with you any longer".  
  
His words were straight to her heart. He didn't want to be with her… why? Was it because of what she had said the night before? "But… I didn't mean it! I told you! I was wrong! Please forgive me…"  
  
There she was again. Apologizing for something she hadn't done. It got him angrier. Why did she have to be so kind? Why couldn't she just hate him? It would be easier! She hates him, and he goes! But no, she had to ask him to stay. She had to make it hard. "Kaoru-dono, you don't understand. I shouldn't be here. I hurt you. I destroyed your life. You said so".  
  
Kaoru felt that he was going and there was nothing she could do to stop him. "But you don't remember what I told you? I was wrong! I wasn't thinking properly! I let my rage take control…"  
  
"Kaoru-dono, maybe you can forgive me…"  
  
She smiled trough her tears. "Yes! Yes! Please Kenshin, don't go. I need you here, with me…"  
  
"…but I can't forgive myself".  
  
She bit her lower lip and cupped his face with her hands. "Kenshin you don't understand…"  
  
"No!" He grabbed her by her wrists. "It's you who don't understand! You don't understand anything!"  
  
Kaou gave a step backwards, frightened. For the first time in all the years Kenshin had been living in the dojo, the samurai had shouted at her.  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
"It was very strange. They behaved as if nothing had happened".  
  
Sanosuke nodded. Strange indeed.  
  
When they arrived at the dojo, a boy was outside the yard's door. He was sat with his face between his hands.  
  
"Yahiko?"  
  
The boy stood up. "Sano! Megumi! I thoght you would never arrive!" His eyes were slightly moistened.  
  
Megumi tried to go into the house, but Yahiko stopped her. "What's happening here?"  
  
The young samurai sighed. "I don't know. Kenshin arrived a few minutes ago. Kaoru and he were talking, but suddenly they started to shout at each other".  
  
Sanosuke grinned. "You mean Jo-chan started to shout at Kenshin".  
  
Yahiko shook his head. "I mean they. At each other".  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
"You never understand!" he started to walk towards the door when a hand grabbed his gi.  
  
"Then… make me understand…" Kenshin turned round. "Make me understand! Try to explain… talk to me! I can't help you if I don't know what troubles you!"  
  
"Who said I want you to help me?"  
  
Her eyes widened. She fell to the floor, trembling. "At the end it's always the same, ne?" She gave him a little smile. "I try my best to make everybody comfortable here, I work, I train, I earn money so that all of you will have food in your stomachs three times a day, I care about you, but it's not enough! It's never enough!" The tears that were falling form her eyes started to draw red lines in her face. "It's just like my father said! I'm useless!"  
  
As Kaoru talked, Kenshin felt his heart squeezing. 'I've done it again. I always do it. I always hurt her'. He kneeled down next to her. "I'm sorry K aoru-dono. I'll try to explain":  
  
She looked at him, not believing what she had just heard.  
  
Kenshin wiped away some of her tears with his thumbs. "This morning I woke up without any bloody nightmare trying to hunt me down. I was in your arms. I felt warm, protected. But I felt I had lost something. When we arrived here, Yahiko reminded me what I had forgot. My pain. I had forgot my pain for a couple of hours. The best hours in my life. And I want to thank you for what you did, for helping me.  
  
"But I remebered my pain. I remembered that I don't deserve being happy, and I don't deserve your help. That's why I don't want you to help me. I don't deserve to be happy".  
  
Kaoru looked at his moistened eyes. Her right hand went to his left cheek. "Kenshin…" His hand stopped hers. "Kenshin… do you think I deserve to be happy?"  
  
The samurai looked at the woman, confused. "Of course Kaoru-dono".  
  
She smiled. "For my happiness, I need you to do something. Would you do it?"  
  
The man didn't understand anything. 'What does she mean?' He stared at her blue eyes and hesitated before saying "Yes Kaoru-dono".  
  
"Right. The first thing you have to do is stop calling me 'dono'. I hate it".  
  
Kenshin was now absolutely confused. A faint voice in his mind tried to remind him that he had to go, but he silenced it. "Kaoru-do- Kaoru".  
  
Her face brighted with a beautiful smile. "Now, the next hting you have to do is allow me to ease your nightmares".  
  
'help me… ease my nightmares…' He was about to say yes when thousand of images crossed his mind. A woman dying, a woman suffocating, a wolf threatening his family, a woman impaled on a wall, blood, screams, death, a woman crying… Kaoru crying… Kaoru dying…  
  
"No!" Kenshin stood up and went outside. Kaoru tried to follow him. "Kenshin!"  
  
The samurai stopped at the door, where Sanosuke, Yahiko and Megumi were staring at him. Kaoru got closer to him. "Kenshin…"  
  
"Don't move!" Kenshin was looking at the ground. His breath was hard. Hundreds of voices screamed in his mind.  
  
'Go!'  
  
'Stay!'  
  
'Run!'  
  
'Kiss her!'  
  
'Kill her!'  
  
'Love her!'  
  
'Hate her!'  
  
He tried to silence the voices, but it was useless. "Shut up!" He closed his eyes.  
  
'Live!'  
  
'Die!'  
  
'Go!'  
  
'Kill!'  
  
'Protect!'  
  
'Kill!'  
  
"Shut up!" But the voices grew louder, faster.  
  
'Kill!'  
  
'Go!'  
  
'Don't!'  
  
'Do!'  
  
'Now!'  
  
'Suffer!'  
  
'Stop!'  
  
'Slay!'  
  
He clutched his head. "Shut up! Shut up!"  
  
'KILL!'  
  
Before he realized what he was doing, his right hand went to his sword, unseathed it and moved.  
  
"Shut up!"  
  
his sword hit something. He heard screams. Something was lying on the floor.  
  
He looked at his sword. Blood. His eyes widened.  
  
Megumi run to the thing that lay on the ground. Sanosuke shook his shoulders and screamed at him, but he could hear nothing. Yahiko ran into the house. And Kaoru…  
  
His sword fell. The image in front of him made him froze. He fainted with a word in his lips. "Kaoru…"  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
My little glossary:  
  
Ohayou: good morning  
  
Ore: I, masculine. Kenshin refers to himself as 'ore' when he's Battousai.  
  
Well, what do you think. Please reviewwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Sorry if you waited too long for the third chapter, but I've just started with my exams. I will try to update every weekend.  
  
See you in th next chapter!!!! ^___^ 


	5. What I've been looking for

Disclaimer: I don't own Rurouni Kenshin… blah, blah, blah…  
  
Sorry for the delay! (Damn exams…) Please don't kill sessha! I had some problems with my teachers… anyway, I'm back.  
  
Thanks for the reviews!!! I'm so happy you like my humble fic!!! ^__^  
  
Well, voilá, the last chapter. Read, enjoy and… review!!!!  
  
  
  
  
  
Shadows from the past.  
  
Chapter five.  
  
What I've been looking for.  
  
  
  
Darkness.  
  
Mist. Shadows fighting, shadows bleeding, shadows dying.  
  
Shadows.  
  
One of the dead shadows stood up and walked to the place where he was. The shadow stopped in front of him, and the man raised his sight to look at it. It was just a shadow, ethereal, intangible, undefined. Just a shadow.  
  
"Do I know you?"  
  
The shadow chuckled at the question. "I thought you knew the faces of all your victims."  
  
The man nodded. "But I can't see your face."  
  
The shadow gave a step back and started to go back to the place where the others shadows were.  
  
"Who are you?"  
  
The shadow stopped again. "You should know it. I'm a shadow."  
  
The man looked at the hundreds of shadows in that place. "Everybody here is a shadow."  
  
The shadow walked again. "Except you."  
  
The man looked at his hands. No, he wasn't a shadow. He was a man. Then what was he doing there?  
  
"Wait." The man ran after the shadow. "My question was wrong. Who were you?"  
  
The shadow turned round to face the man. "You don't need to know who I were. You don't want to know who I were."  
  
"Then, tell me… where are you from?"  
  
The shadow started to vanish. With the las rests of it a faint voice answered him. "From your past… everybody here comes from your past…"  
  
The man looked around him. All the shadows had surrounded him. "What do you want from me?"  
  
An echoing voice came from one of the shadows. "Don't worry Battousai. We aren't going to hurt you. We can't."  
  
His hand went to his sword. "I'm no longer the man you're looking for."  
  
The shadow who had just talked got closer to him. "Then who are you now?"  
  
"Now…" The man seemed to hesitate. "Now I am Kenshin Himura. It's my turn. Who were you then and who are you now?"  
  
"Then I was a samurai. Now I am a shadow in your mind." Two blue eyes appeared in what used to be the shadow's face. "Now I am a shadow in her mind." With its last words, the shadow started to take the shape of a human being. "A shadow from your past." Finally its face appeared. "A shadow from her past."  
  
Kenshin's eyes widened as he saw the shadow's face.  
  
"Do you remember my face Kenshin Himura?"  
  
He nodded.  
  
"Do you know why you are here?"  
  
He tried to find his voice, but only a faint sound came from his mouth. "No."  
  
The shadow smirked. "You are here to fight."  
  
Kenshin lowered his head. "I'm tired of fighting Kamiya-dono."  
  
The young woman unsheathed her sword. Her gi and hakama were covered with blood, while her long black hair was tied in a high ponytail. "I don't think so. You aren't tired of fighting. WE are tired of fighting."  
  
The shadow made a fast movement, easily avoided by the man. "I don't want to hurt you."  
  
The woman sheathed her sword. "You can't hurt us Himura-san. We are dead. We want to be free."  
  
Kenshin frowned. "Free?"  
  
"Yes, free!" All the shadows shouted with the woman. "We are tired of fighting with you every night! We want to rest, we want to be free! But it's impossible unless you want to set us free."  
  
Kenshin looked at the woman in front of him. "I can't. It's my punishment. I have to remember what I have done. I can't forget it. It would be unfair."  
  
"Unfair?!" The woman grabbed him by his gi. "Let me tell you what's unfair! It's unfair that we have to wait to your death to be free! It's unfair to be trapped in this damn place for years waiting for our freedom!"  
  
Another shadow gave a step forwards. "It's unfair that we have to fight every night so that you can feel better!"  
  
The rest of the shadows started to shout at him and closed the circle. Finally a pair of shadows stopped in front of Kenshin.  
  
"Anata…"  
  
His eyes widened. That voice…  
  
"…it's unfair… we want to be free." The shadow who had just talked took the shape of a woman. Her hand was entwined with the hand of the shadow beside her, a man. "Himura-san, our stay here is unfair. If you don't free us, there will be another shadow joining us soon."  
  
Kenshin looked at the man. "Mine…"  
  
The woman shook her head. "Not yours anata. Kaoru-san's…"  
  
He stared at the couple in front of him. She was just as he rememebered. She had her long black hair tied in a low ponytail. Her skin was white, as white as her kimono, as white as the snow which witnessed her death. "But… she's not dead!"  
  
The woman shook her head again. "You don't need to be dead to turn into a shadow, anata. A shadow is something empty, a shell that will only be what it used to be if it's free. Kaoru-san is empty."  
  
The first woman looked right to his eyes. "Himura-san, you said that you are no longer Battousai. Then, why do you have to atone for his sins?"  
  
"Because… no matter what I do or what I say… I know Battousai will always be a part of me. And I know… I know that Kaoru-dono will never accept that."  
  
The shadow sighed. "You think to little of my sister, Himura-san. Anyway, it doesn't matter anymore. There will be no 'Kaoru-dono' when you come back. Only a shadow. Only a shell."  
  
The woman with black eyes talked. "History repeats itself anata."  
  
Kenshin's hand went to his forehead. History repeats… "No! I can't allow it. I will not allow it!"  
  
"All you have to do is set us free."  
  
Kenshin looked at the man who had just talked."How…?"  
  
The shadows started to vanish. "You did it once anata. You can do it again."  
  
He tried to grasp the shadows. "Wait! I don't know! Tell me what I have to do please!"  
  
"She's waiting for you anata. Sayonara."  
  
  
  
Kenshin opened his eyes. He sat up, sweating and panting. He was in his futon, in his room. He tried to catch his sword, but it wasn't where it should. He quickly went out of the room and bumped into someone.  
  
"Itai! Damn, why don't you… K-Kenshin!"  
  
Kenshin helped the boy to stand up. What he saw in the boy's eyes shocked him. He was… afraid? Of him?  
  
"Yahiko, do you know where my sword is?"  
  
The boy swallowed. "Sanosuke took it."  
  
He frowned. "Sanosuke? Why?"  
  
Yahiko swallowe harder. "I… why don't you ask him? I have things to do…" With that the boy went out of the house as fast as he could.  
  
What was happening there? Kenshin started to look for Sanosuke. When he was near Kaoru's room the man he was looking for went out of it. "K-Kenshin!"  
  
"Sano, where's my sword?"  
  
Sanosuke started to scratch his head. "Well… you see… I… I hid it."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Well, you can't… mmm… you know, a sword is not a toy, right?… and… someone could be hurt…"  
  
Kenshin knew that his frien was hiding something apart from his sword. "Give it to me."  
  
The taller man started to sweat. "I… can't."  
  
He can't? "Why?"  
  
Sanosuke sighed. "Look, Kenshin, do you trust me?"  
  
More strange questions. "You know I do Sano."  
  
"Then believe when I tell you that I can't give you the sword. And stop asking."  
  
"But…"  
  
"I said no more questions."  
  
"Sano…"  
  
"Hush. I'm a very bussy man. Come back when you have something important to tell me." Sano started to walk to the kitchen, thinking that everything had finished, when a question froze him.  
  
"Where's Kaoru-dono?"  
  
'Shit!' He turned round to face Kenshin. "Well…" 'Shit! What do I tell him now!?' "She… you can't see her now."  
  
Kenshin was starting to get very nervous, and the excuses Sano was giving him did nothing to help. "Why?"  
  
"'Cos…"  
  
In that moment Megumi went out of Kaoru's room. "Don't worry, Sano. The cut isn't very deep. She's still unconscious, but she…" The doctor stopped at the frantic gestures of Sanosuke. "What?" She turned around. "Oh my…"  
  
Kenshin looked at her in shock and entered the room despite the attemps of his friends to stop him. The sight in front of him froze his blood. Kaoru lay on her futon with her chest completely bandaged. He tried to get closer to her, but Megumi stood between them. "Go out of the room, Kenshin."  
  
"No."  
  
She sighed. "Please Kenshin, Kaoru needs to rest. You should leave her alone."  
  
He sat beside the futon. "I won't disturb her. I will just stay here."  
  
The doctor was about to say something but Sanosuke stopped her. "Leave them alone."  
  
They started to leave when a voice called them. "Wait Sano."  
  
The man looked at Kenshin. "What?"  
  
The samurai lowered his head, his hands shaking. "How did I do this… if the sword's blade is reversed?"  
  
Sanosuke closed his eyes. "Kenshin… you turned it."  
  
Kenshin was left alone with his thoughts, his pain and his new victim. His new shadow.  
  
  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
  
  
She didn't make a move for several hours. Either did he.  
  
He looked at his face. So pale… Her eyes, usually wide and curious, remained closed. The dark hair surrounding her face made her skin look paler.  
  
He caught her hand. His angel was becoming a shadow. He didn't want to think what it would be like, living in an empty body… because of him. He had to stop it. He didn't know how, he just knew that he had to.  
  
Squeezing her hand he let a whisper out. "Please forgive me."  
  
"I told you that I would always forgive you." A faint voice came from the futon.  
  
"Kaoru!" One of his hands went to her face. "How are you?"  
  
She smiled. "I've been better. Thank you Kenshin."  
  
He frowned. "For what?"  
  
"For calling me Kaoru."  
  
Kenshin smiled. It was so easy to make her happy. "I'm so sorry…"  
  
"Shhh. I know. You don't need to talk. Just stay with me."  
  
Kenshin lowered his gaze. "Kaoru… I…"  
  
She closed her eyes and breathed deeply. "You're going."  
  
He nodded.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because… there's something I have to do… and I don't know how…"  
  
Her hands started to shake. She wouldn't cry again. She wouldn't. "What…?"  
  
"It's… I…" He looked into her eyes. The eyes… windows of the soul… Tomoe's eyes were black, dark, silent. Kaoru's eyes were shining, clean, kind… beautiful. His eyes were strange. They could change its colour, showing two souls which were absolutely different, yet at the time absolutely the same. "Kaoru… how do you think… is it possible that one person owns two souls… I don't know…"  
  
Her right hand went to his cheek. Slender fingers traced the scar softly. Kenshin closed his eyes, shuddering.  
  
"Kenshin, do you remember what I told you that day?"  
  
His left hand went to his cheek to capture her hand before it fell. "When?"  
  
"When I told you that I wanted the rurouni to stay, not the hitokiri."  
  
He nodded.  
  
She remained silent for a moment. "I was wrong."  
  
Kenshin opened his eyes.  
  
"Kenshin… I want the rurouni to stay here with me. I want the hitokiri to stay here with me. I want Kenshin Himura to stay here with me… every side of you… all the pieces that make of you the man I love."  
  
The samurai gasped at the words. "But… how…"  
  
Her fingers, still on his cheek, moved clumsyly to his lips to silence him. "I used to see the hitokiri as a threat. Something which was apart of you, something that could hurt us. I used to think that you had two souls Kenhsin. But yesterday I realized how wrong I had been. Battousai is not a threat, he's a part of you, he is you. Like the rurouni, Battousai needs to be comforted, understood. You deserve to be comforted an undrestood completely, but I hadn't been able to see it earlier. I couldn't understand you until it was too late." She smiled. "Kenshin, you own two souls, two hearts. But those souls aren't the rurouni and Battousai's ones. One of them is Kenshin Himura's soul. The other one is Kaoru Kamiya's soul."  
  
He looked into her eyes. He saw the love he used to see in them, the compassion, the care… but he found for the first time what he had been looking for in his years of wandering, in his years of hitokiri… actually, what he had been looking for since a man decided to change his name. He had been looking for frienship, a new life… even love… and he had found everything in his new family. But now, in those eyes, in that woman, he had just found what he had really been looking even thoguh he didn't know he needed it. He saw it in her eyes.  
  
Understanding.  
  
She had always accepted him, but he could see the slight fear which used to hid behind her eyes. She had been afraid of that side of him she had never understood completely. She knew he had been fighting to make a better world but… then, why was he still there? She couldn't understand the true reasons, the true feelings behind his mask.  
  
Until the mask fell, showing his true soul, the living hell he had impossed himself. That night he saw the real fears, the real ghosts of Kenshin Himura, turning real.  
  
But she saved him.  
  
And now, one day later, she was again saving him. How could she now? How could she understand him?  
  
He wanted to talk, he wanted to say something, anything, but the words didn't reach his mouth. He kept staring fascinated at her eyes, feeling a heavy weigh falling of his soul.  
  
Kenshin tried to find something which could tell him that she would be better without him, that even loneliness was better than his company, but he couldn't find a reason to leave her side. He couldn't leave her. Not now, not ever.  
  
His mouth moved slightly. "Kaoru… I…"  
  
"Shhh. I told you. You don't need to talk. Just stay with me… please… at least until you go…"  
  
Kenshin bent until his face was only a few inches away from hers. Her breath mixed with his whisper. "I'm not going."  
  
She looked into his eyes. Violet… and amber… A perfect mixture of sweet amethyst and shining gold, glowing in the darkness of the room. "But… you've just said that you had to find…"  
  
"Shh." His breath caressed her lips. "I've already found what I was looking for."  
  
Her eyes started to close. Her lips parted slightly in invitation. Their lips joined, first sweetly, then deeper…  
  
The candle in the corner flickered once, twice. The light drawed shadows on the thin wall.  
  
Two shadows… One shadow…  
  
Two souls… One soul…  
  
No more nightmares. No more punishment. No more shadows.  
  
With the last of the shadows, a faint voice surrounded the two sleeping forms.  
  
"Sayonara imoutochan…  
  
Arigato… Himura-san…"  
  
  
  
} Owari {  
  
  
  
  
  
My little glossary:  
  
Anata: you. Used by a wife to his husband has a different meaning, darling I think, but I'm not sure.  
  
Sayonara: goodbay.  
  
Imoutochan: younger sister.  
  
Owari: the end.  
  
  
  
Yes, it's finished! Did youlike it? Did you hate it? Please tell me!!  
  
Thanks to all for reading! Thanks! Arigato! Gracias!  
  
I have one more question… I understand why Megumi is a fox, but why is Kaoru a raccoon? And why is Missao a weasel? If any of you can tell me, I'd be very thankful (I've asked some of my friends, but nobody understand so I'm not the only one…)  
  
You are still here? C'mon, review! It's easy, there's a little button down… you just have to click.  
  
Thanks again!!! ^__^x 


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